Own All Of You


When we were created, God gave us some tools (faculties) to help us navigate through life successfully; each tool is programmed and runs on auto pilot in performing the original task it was created for.

These tools are not ‘You’. They do not define who you are, but how they operate in everything else is totally up to you. You ‘own’ them temporarily and you are held accountable on how you decide to use them. Taming them, looking after them and reprogramming them is your responsibility.

Some of these tools are:

The Heart
The Self
The Brain (3 Brains actually)
The Mind

Along with the specific tasks they perform, they act as your loyal helpers in living your desired life (at least this is their true good intention!)

They send you recommendations on how you should feel, think and behave in any given situation.
The quality of these recommendations is actually determined by how well you have been looking after and caring for these faculties.
And the intensity of these recommendations is determined by how much control you exert over them.
The truthfulness and usefulness of these recommendations are determined by how you have been feeling, thinking and behaving lately!
But the final decision you make -wether it is in line with these recommendations or not- is totally up to you!!!!!

Whenever you feel unable to make a decision or to choose a path, or unable to move forward in a certain direction (that you may think you want!), know that there is an internal conflict between two or more of these faculties; they are presenting different conflicting recommendations to you all at once, and you probably feel torn in between!

If excellence and ‘Tamkeen’ in life are desires of yours, you should really claim your control back over all of these faculties. This will guarantee that you really get the best out of them. It will also guarantee that the recommendations they send will truly be in line with what you want.

Integration is key if you want to move forward!

Since everything –well almost everything- is processed inside your brain, it should be a good place to start.

All your ‘Parts’ -wether they originally reside in your brain or not- meet inside your brain; to discuss your life 🙂
Every ‘part’ of you owns a specific system in your brain to process what this ‘part’ recommends!
You’ also reside a certain system inside your brain!!!!

Therefore; ‘You’ are not your brain, ‘You’ are only one system in it!!!!
But you are the Big Boss, the conductor. At least this is who you should be!

Your job as the ‘Boss’ is to dictate your desires and plans to the ‘Parts’ i.e.: set the agenda.
To make sure they pay attention you should reveal the importance and the value of these plans (This is essential for Integration).
And to offer some guidelines (criteria) to the kind of recommendations you are looking for.
And when you start receiving some input -no matter how valuable it is- you should always think it over!

A good boss always does 🙂

Your Triune Brain and ‘You

You have three different Brain Systems, each has its own very specific task, and thus their own idea of how your priorities should be arranged and what best serves your interests.

Internal conflict arises when each system insists on performing its task according to its own agenda regardless of what you really want.

Your Reticular Brain
This brain system puts your physical safety and wellbeing ahead of anything else. If you –God forbids- have a goal that may seem as a risk to your physical wellbeing in any way, this brain will simply step in and stops you from moving any further.

It will keep sending you urgent recommendations to change your plans, and may even hijack your own behaviour by taking over the control panel of your whole body!!!

If ‘you’ allow that to happen, you will be unable to move forward.
You will be unable to achieve your goal.

Your Limbic System
This brain is all about looking after you emotionally. It processes and regulates your emotions. This entitles it to make sure you are accepted by the group; that you conform to the social ethical standards of it. To ensure there is a place for you to go to in times of need.

It ‘saves’ all your emotional experiences and regularly checks what you are going through in any given moment to what is already ‘saved’.

It is always on guard in case something might happen to hurt your feelings in anyway. It makes you tense around people you don’t like and relax when you are among the people you know, love and trust. According to this brain, familiar is good, change is BAD.

And since emotions are very versatile and tend to be experienced in a range, this brain doesn’t take the risk of you being mildly upset. It filters everything according to yes/no and either/or. So if you- God forbids again- wish to achieve something that might cause you some frustration, it will try to stop you with all the power it has.

And it does have a lot of power.

The Limbic System is an auditory system, which means that most of all its processing happens in words.
Words that you can hear inside your head!
I often call it العيل الغلس who lives inside your head!!!
The one who always says, ‘It is never going to work’, ‘You will never be able to pull this off’, ‘Why take the risk?’, ‘You will fail, BIG’…etc.

And the tricky part is; the brain wave of this system is very balanced, which means that the voice that you hear inside your head often has a wise quality in it. Sounds like the ‘voice of wisdom’ although what it says is usually unreasonable. Good intention though!!

Giving in to this voice sometimes seems easy and natural, but way too dangerous.
Simply because your ‘habits’ start to materialize and take shape inside this brain.
By blindly accepting its recommendations, you are embracing negativity as a way of being!

Use your Neo-Cortex to challenge it, question it and to think!

Your Neo-Cortex
This brain system is what makes you ‘human’.
It differentiates you from every other being that walks on this earth.
It has tremendous powers to make your dreams come true, but you truly need to take control of it before your other ‘parts’ do!
It possesses all your skills, strengths, knowledge, capabilities…etc within it and uses them to get the result that is wanted.
It thinks, imagines, creates, develops, dreams, assesses, weighs, analyses, connects, envisions, concludes…etc
And, it follows orders.
It follows orders regardless of who is giving them!

Although it is very strong and powerful, the other two systems tend to bully your Neo-Cortex and turn it off from time to time(sometimes the heart takes over too). This happens especially because ‘you’ as the boss do not really give it its well deserved prestige and respect it genuinely earns.
You don’t use it often!
Imagine all the things you can do if these three systems are on board with your goals and dreams. If they are working for you!

Your ‘Self’ and ‘You’

وَنَفۡسٍ۬ وَمَا سَوَّٮٰهَا (٧) فَأَلۡهَمَهَا فُجُورَهَا وَتَقۡوَٮٰهَا (٨) قَدۡ أَفۡلَحَ مَن زَكَّٮٰهَا (٩) وَقَدۡ خَابَ مَن دَسَّٮٰهَ
And  [by]  the  self  and  He  who  proportioned  it. And  inspired  it  [with  discernment  of]  its  wickedness  and  its  righteousness. He  has  succeeded  who  purifies  it. And  he  has  failed  who  instills  it  [with  corruption].

What is the ‘Self’?
A well accepted definition is (the totality of sentiments, tendencies, desires, wishes, experiences, impulses, fears, appetites and the heredity characteristics. It is your ego, superego, it is the essence of you, and it is the ‘being’ that lives inside you and makes you who you are).

Sometimes, it is difficult to draw the line between ‘you’ and your ‘self’, but I will try to make it easy for you.

There is a certain part inside your brain that processes what your ‘Self’ desires, wants, wishes, fears…etc everything that your ego recommends or suggests at any given moment rests and ends there. It resides there.
This part does not have the power to act, execute or implement any of these desires or wishes on its own –it only has the power to ‘nag’ :).
Your ‘Self’ has no access to the ‘ENTER’ button inside your brain. This explains why ‘you’ are held accountable to what you decide to do even if it was your ‘Self’ who urged you to do it the first place!

What about ‘You’ then? Who are ‘You’?

فَمَن شَآءَ فَلۡيُؤۡمِن وَمَن شَآءَ فَلۡيَكۡفُرۡ‌ۚ
‘whoever  wills, let  him  believe;  and  whoever wills, let  him  disbelieve.”
The word شَآء (will) makes it easy to draw this line between ‘you’ and your ‘self’, combined with زَكَّٮٰهَا (purifies) in the first verse, we can easily conclude that You’ are شَآء , ‘you’ are  زَكَّٮٰهَا, ‘you’ are the one pulling all the strings.

The True YOU ‘Your True Identity’ lies in the decision making part inside your brain; Frontal Lobe, not in the other parts that send recommendations
You’ are the one in control; ‘you’ are the only one who has access to the ENTER button.

Again, as for someone who is in control- as the Big Boss– you really should pause, take your time and question the recommendations you receive before you press ENTER.
Never press it blindly!!!!!
Think, Think, Think!

Your ‘Self’; what is it good for????

God certainly didn’t give you a ‘Self’ so you will be nagged and dragged all the time.
Your ‘Self’ – believe it or not- is the being that really knows your main task here on earth, and it receives great satisfaction from fulfilling this task regardless of its type. It strives to accomplish your main mission that God dictated to you (It witnessed that day!).

It is the being inside you that learns, and digests all what is learned.

It has the power to connect with knowledge and learning. It dreams, moves and floats freely in parts of your mind-verbal and non verbal– you never thought existed!
Thus, has access to incredible amount of information about you, and is able to collect and filter what is missing, simply because it knows.
Your ‘Self’ is able to acquire the information you need from ‘within as well as from without’.

(Praying really gives you tremendous power over your ‘self’ and the ability to command it to move in the direction you want to access the information you need!)

A lot of people focus on فَأَلۡهَمَهَا فُجُورَهَا and totally forget that God also   أَلۡهَمَهَا تَقۡوَٮٰهَا
They try to suppress the ‘Self’ every time it nags and drags; whereas sometimes it nags because this is what ‘you’ truly have to do!!!!
When you suppress it all the time, you are taking the risk of quieten it altogether, and it will not reveal to you what you need to know.
By taking your time to think about what it is nagging about, and to check its relevance; you will be able to differentiate between فُجُورَهَا and تَقۡوَٮٰهَا .
Here is a tip, when you busy your ‘self’ with what really matters, it will stop nagging about the trivial things!!!

Finally, the proverb says ‘Believe in your ‘self’’. It doesn’t say believe in you 🙂 Set the direction and rest assure your ‘Self’ knows how to take you there.

It is your compass. It is your (GPS).

Your Heart and ‘you’
In order to have a clear start, your ‘self’ has no control over your heart.
In fact, your heart is your last defence line against فجور النفس By checking with your heart every time your ‘self’ nags, you save a lot of effort and trouble later on. (Assuming that your heart is ‘good’ and that ‘you’ don’t usually follow the desires of your ‘self’).

But I am not here to talk about that.

The heart consists of a good chunk of brain cells, which makes it act as if it has a mind of its own, it thinks, visualizes, processes, perceives, and also recommends. And oh how strong and urgent its recommendations can be!!!! And how valuable!!
The pathways going from the Heart to the Brain outnumber the pathways from the Brain to the Heart.
You are indeed overwhelmed by your Heart.

Its recommendations affect mental clarity, creativity, emotional balance, and personal effectiveness. In total it affects intelligence and awareness.

‘The heart is the most powerful generator of rhythmic information pattern in the human body. It functions as sophisticated information encoding and processing centre, and possesses a far more developed communication system with the brain than do most of the body’s major organs.
With every beat the heart not only bumps blood, but also transmits complex patterns of neurological, hormonal, pressure and electromagnetic information to the brain… the heart appeared to be sending meaningful messages to the brain that is not only understood, but obeyed.’ HeartMath Institue

‘Follow your Heart’
Your Heart really has its strong influence in decision making, and you should always check with your heart before you press ‘Enter’. But you want to make sure that the recommendations are relevant and will actually take you to your destination before you decide to follow it.

So, how to control the quality of recommendations the heart sends ‘you’?
To guarantee that the recommendations are of relevance and of superb quality, you should make your heart follow you first!!!!!
And it does actually follow ‘you’ before it recommends a certain action!
It checks how you have been feeling, thinking and behaving lately, registers all of that and sends its recommendations accordingly.
‘Follow your heart’ is actually a roundabout!

You truly need to have control over how you feel, how you think and what you think about, and how you behave in order to tame your different ‘parts’  and set a good example for them to follow.

This is the criteria they -your parts- will then use to give you their recommendations later on!
I know it sounds like ‘the egg and the chicken’ kind of thing, maybe it is.
But there is one more ‘faculty’ that you can use, that will help you achieve that Insha’Allah.

Your MIND and ‘You
Can you hear the drumbeats?

Some people avoid talking about the ‘mind’; because they think it is something intangible that cannot really be understood.
That it is something you cannot own. Far from it!!
In fact, you use your ‘conscious mind’ to own all your ‘parts’.

How? You may ask!
By its power of ‘FOCUS’.

Your conscious mind acts as a periscope of attention. And your whole life will follow your attention!
You feel the emotions you focus on. You understand and digest the thoughts you focus on. You accomplish the tasks you focus on.
And ‘you’ choose what you focus on!!!
Your ‘parts’ will send you the recommendations about the things you focus on!

By integrating the powers and intention of all your ‘parts’, you clear the way to dive into the place that holds all the relevant information.

Once you are there, use the power of focus to get the answers you are looking for.
Then, you will start getting more of what you focus on 🙂

Getting the Answers from your unconscious mind!

Anything and everything that has/had been out of your focus -since you were born-, your unconscious mind saw it, heard it, perceived, collected it, analysed it, and stored it.
All the answers you are looking for are probably stored there,


For you to focus on!